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With many spring birthdays on the horizon, here are a few thoughts about teaching our children the art of giving and receiving gifts. Before attending an event, talk with your child about the person he or she is giving the gift to. Ask about their likes and dislikes and the kind of gift they might enjoy. Help your child to understand that giving gifts is not about us, the gift giver, and what we like but about selecting a gift that matches the recipient’s interests. Once you have a short list of ideas, give your child a budget or, even better, have them pay for the gift with their own money. Use the gift-buying process as a tool to teach thoughtful consideration.

If your child is the birthday girl or boy, have your child open the gifts at the party, look the giver in the eye, and thank them for the gift. By collecting the gifts and having your child open them at home, you take away the gift giver’s satisfaction of watching the recipient’s pleasure and your child’s opportunity to learn how to express thanks in front of others. If you think your child is too young to express thanks or to open a large number of gifts in front of others, the guest listmayneed to be reducedor the invitation should read, “No gifts please.” Gifts are not a right—they are after all . . . a gift!